There is lightning all over the sky, for several hours.
The air is hot and sticky, and there is never rain, only a dreary leftover bit of the dry day and June-bugs everywhere, buzzing.
I lay on my back on the deck. There’s a caterpillar in my hair; I shake it out.
My mind is running through 1st Kings 19.
… Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”
Elijah was afraid and ran for his life … a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”
I counted my exits – I knew the school year was drawing to a close, and I wouldn’t see these people again, so I thought, why not share the gospel now?
And Paul’s all like: “I am not ashamed of the gospel.”
Elijah runs. Unlike Jonah, who runs away from God, Elijah runs to God. But if you know God, don’t all roads lead to Him?
And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?”
He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left,and now they are trying to kill me too.”
Lord, I’ve striven all year for your glory. I’ve botched it badly, I know; but I did try. Yet no one has listened – no one has chosen you despite all I could do. And God, I’m left here now, and it’s all over. What was it all for?
There is lightning against the dark blue sky, and the wind comes strong, whipping dry leaves across my arms, but there is no rain.
(this was more of a ten-minute post)